SWMLFW.

How many of you tried to read it as if it were a license plate or something? Even though I knew what it stood for, I tried to read it that way. My backwards mind read it as "SwimFlow", but that doesn't work. How about "SawMilfWalking"? Nope, still not right and a little inappropriate. What it's meant to stand for is "Single White Male Looking For Wife". That's right! 

Okay, maybe not a full fledged wife right now, but seeing all my friends around me getting married is definitely giving me "couple envy". I enjoy being single and am quite good at it. Sometimes, it would be nice to have that special someone though.

Here's the thing. I hate dating. I'm the type of guy that excels at being in a relationship, but not so much with the dating scene. Don't get me wrong, I can court like the best of them, but not too many girls are interested in my courting techniques. I can be fairly old school when it comes to that department. If I could find someone who appreciated all the little things I like, and was willing to embrace my quirkiness, then I think we'd be laughing.

I want the comfort stage where we can both sit on the couch in massive ripped clothes, eat chips & dip for dinner without judgement, and pass out watching a lame TV show like CSI: New Jersey. Yet still embracing our romantic side from time to time with love letters, date nights, and thoughtful gifts. I'm the type of person who tries to do "good in life", so whoever I'm with, I want to include them as one of the things I'm good at.

So, if you're single and looking for a husband, please send me your relationship resume.

Are you there wife? It's me, the guy with the smile.